081 | In which the ending of Dragon Age 2 threatens to leave me as an emotional wreck

[straightforwardly]

I beat Dragon Age 2! So let’s talk about what happened.

• So, before I started playing for the day, my brother and I were talking about what’s going on with Anders, and he figured it out:
  
  Anders is secretly running a pet shop.
  
  I haven't quite figured out why Anders would be so secretive about it, but give me time.


• Sandal… just gave a prophecy. O_O It was suitably ominous.


• Merrill and Fenris’ banters either got better, or weren’t as bad as I remembered. They just had the most bittersweet conversation about Anders, in which Merrill pitied him (“he’s broken the thing he wanted to save”, which, D: ), Fenris didn’t understand it, and they somehow still came to an agreement in the end.


• Time to see what Orsino wants!


• oh hi Kevan WAIT WHAT. THEY KIDNAPPED BETHANY. YOU MONSTERS. HOW DARE YOU KIDNAP BETHANY.


• Thrask. Hawke is sympathetic to your cause. Kidnapping her little sister? Isn’t going to help. At all.


• ...Okay, I feel a little sorry for Thrask, what with watching his cause fall down around his ears while one of his co-conspirators goes all blood mage on him.


• You know, Bethany and Hawke really don’t get the best reunion.
  
  Reunion #01: Qunari are attacking the city!
  Reunion #02: They’re in the depths of the Deep Roads where they were originally parted from one another!
  Reunion #03: Post-Bethany kidnapping.


• Bethany: “It’s nice to know you’re still looking after me.” Always. ♥


• In other news, Hawke’s gift-giving game is DEFINITELY DOWN, if Fenris’ reaction to that sword is any indication.


• Merrill’s sympathy for Anders is giving me so many feelings about their relationship. I love how she’s envious of his conviction / certainty, since her own shattered around her ears.


• Crap, end of the game time. I suppose it’s time to buy up all the shops!


• Orsino and Meredith are arguing again. Surprise, surprise.


• Oh no. Oh no no no no.


• HOLY SHIT. ANDERS. WHAT DID YOU DO?!?!?!?


• WHY COULDN'T IT BE A SECRET PET SHOP???


• NO. NO EXECUTING ALL MAGES. NO. That is in no way whatsoever the right response to this mess!


• Hawke’s very hurt by this betrayal. “Is this why you needed me to distract the grand cleric?”


• Oh, Aveline’s “I don’t know if I can stand with you” made me sadface. But then there was Merrill’s “I believe in you”, and oh, my heart. And then there was Isabela, with a much-needed moment of levity: “Shit, what have you gotten yourself into this time, Isabela?”


• Nooo Fenris, don’t go. I mean, I understand his not wanting to fight for mages, but still. Sadface.


• Aveline stayed! This makes me ridiculously happy. ♥ ♥ ♥ I thought she’d leave almost for sure.


• Orsino’s quiet “thank you” for not abandoning the mages does awful things to my heart.


• And here is Anders, sitting on a box. A banter Isabela and Anders once had about justice— and the price that needs to be paid for it— suddenly takes on a whole new light for me. SADFACES EVERYWHERE.


• Poor Hawke, trying to find a reason for this betrayal. “Did Justice make you do this?” But she doesn’t even get that comfort.


• ANDERS. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO MY HEART. His reasons for not wanting to tell Hawke. “What if you tried to stop me? Or worse— what if you wanted to help?” He’s so very broken, and he seems aware enough of that to know that he doesn’t want to drag Hawke down with him. >_>


• ”Perhaps then Justice will at least be free.” TOO DEPRESSING.


• So, Hawke asked her companions what they thought. Varric was typically neutral while Aveline took the obvious pro-law stance. Isabela thought it was a “bold plan”, but it was Merrill’s response that really struck me, with how she advocated for him having a second chance, and making up for what he did. It just really reminded me of what he said to her after what happened with Marethari, though, of course, the context is pretty different.


• Hawke decided to spare Anders. She felt deeply betrayed by all of this, and thinks that what he did was wrong, but she’s also lost too many people she’s cared about, and she absolutely refuses to lose another, no matter what the cause.
  
  And then this happened:
  
  Hawke: “Fight for the mages with me.”
  Anders: “You mean you want me to stay with you?”
  
  Ugh, the tone of his voice, and his general shock… just, so many feelings.


• For another brief moment of levity: I accidentally talked to Merrill while trying to loot the bodies, and she went, “It’s a pretty evening, isn’t it?” MERRILL. THIS IS WHAT WE REFER TO AS AN ILL-TIMED COMMENT.


• BETHANY! oh my god I didn’t expect to see her again THIS IS THE BEST.


• Oh my god, Bethany is so sweet. This whole conversation is so sweet.
  
  Bethany: “I’ve looking everywhere for you. I thought you were dead.”
  Hawke: “Not a chance.”


• AND THEN SHE APOLOGIZES FOR BEING UPSET WITH HAWKE: “You’re the only family I have. If you need my help against the templars, just say the word.” AND “Right now I’m not a Grey Warden, I’m your sister. I blamed you for putting me in the Order but you did it to help me. I was wrong.” TOO MANY FEELINGS. I am “awwww”-ing all over the place.


• “The Hawke sisters together again, just like old times.” YESSSS PERFECT. SO HAPPY.


• SHIT I NEED TO CHOOSE A PARTY NOW NOT FAIR.
  
  MERRILL OR BETHANY MERRILL OR BETHANY
  
  THIS IS SUCH AN UNFAIR CHOICE


• Okay, I went with Merrill, mainly because I couldn’t remember what Bethany’s skill set was like. Still. THE THINGS I WOULD DO FOR JUST ONE MORE SLOT FOR PARTY MEMBERS.


• Oh god this Merrill-Varric banter is the saddest. Her asking him about how this “story” ends because she “might not see it end”. And then, Varric’s quiet, “You have to stick with us if you want to know how it turns out, Daisy.” I am too invested in this friendship. >_>


• They all just look so sad &/or grim on the boat ride to the Gallows.


• Oh, Aveline. “You really put loyalty to the test, you know.”
  
  Hawke apologized for messing up her life, and Aveline went, ‘that tends to happen to your friends’, which, OUCH. But right when Hawke was reeling from that one, she told Hawke that it was worth it. This friendship. T_T


• BETHANY. Her talking about how she never had a chance to say goodbye to Carver? SLAYED ME. Her subsequent, “Just know that I love you” didn’t help much on that front either.
  
  And then Hawke kept the emotional volleys coming with her tentative, “Does that mean you forgive me?”


• “I couldn’t ask for a better sister.” ♥ ♥ ♥ I LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCH.


• After Anders thanked Hawke for not abandoning him, she went to Varric, and said something that basically sums this Hawke up in a nutshell: “I know we have to do this, but I won’t want to lose people.”


• Hee, Merrill is just as flustered as I thought she’d be.
  
  Also, Hawke cracked a joke to try to calm her down, which had the unexpected effect of revealing that Merrill apparently wants to see Hawke naked???? MY HAWKE/ISABELA/MERRILL DREAMS ARE ONE STEP CLOSER TO FRUITION.


• Finally, Isabela. And oh, this conversation really did it for me. I love how Hawke opened it up by telling her that she didn’t have to do this, and how Isabella went, NOPE, don’t be ridiculous, I’m not abandoning you.


• “Promise me I won’t lose you.” Oh, Isabela. ♥ ♥ ♥


• Okay, there have been some pretty great kisses between these two in this game, but I think this was my favorite.


• I loved Hawke’s comments to the companions that weren’t selected to be in the main party. Aveline’s “I should be at your side” gave me FEELINGS, predictably enough, as did Hawke’s stressing that Bethany should fight from a distance and stay safe.
  
  Also, Hawke’s awesome at making speeches. I felt inspired, haha.


• Oh, Orsino. =( “Why not drown us as infants? Why give us hope?”


• NO ORSINO, NO. DON’T DO IT. DDDD:


• Okay, I love that the other party members joined in on this fight too. We’re all together in this! ♥


• After Hawke killed Orsino twice, she and her companions started making their way through the gallows.


• NO FENRIS NO.


• HAWKE DOESN’T WANT TO HURT YOU. LISTEN TO HER.


• I didn’t see his body, so I’m just… going to pretend that he slipped away at some point. And then Hawke’s going to meet him at some point post-game, and they’re going to have a long talk, and no one’s going to kill each other. Because no.


• Go Cullen! Also, Meredith has a creepy red sword. There’s no way this could go wrong!


• DAMNIT BARTRAND


• She has the glowy eyes spectacles. Hawke’s experience with Anders has taught her that this is a Very Bad Sign.


• HOLY SHIT STATUE CAME TO LIFE


• Pro-tip, Meredith: Threatening the people she loves is a surefire way to guarantee that Hawke is going to go take you down.


• .............................I’m really, really glad that I didn’t let Varric keep that idol now.


• The templars surrounded Hawke and friends! SO MUCH TENSION.


• Okay, good. So we didn’t have to fight our way out, which left the way open for Hawke and friends to skedaddle out of Kirkwall.


• Which begs the question: What happens with Orana? I know that Sandal + his dad were already planning to head off towards Orlais at some point, but she… really didn’t have anywhere to go.


• Okay, the idea that everyone (“Except for Isabela, of course”) slowly had to leave Hawke makes me SUPER SAD. I’m going to pretend that she slowly went around gathering them up again the moment it seemed even somewhat safer.


• Ha, Varric’s converted Cassandra into a Hawke fangirl. This is great.


• She’s gone, “just like the Warden.” !!!!
  
  And then: “That’s no coincidence.”


In conclusion: SO MANY FEELINGS. SO MANY. I feel like this ending was pretty much a constant barrage of emotion. Just. Loved this game, so, so much.